Bathroom Bar Art #15

FOUND BY: Commish CH
WHERE: Woody Creek Tavern, Woody Creek CO

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2013 For Certain: Top CO Beer Spots

 

2013 can certainly be remember as a year where the craft brewery really blew up across the Centennial State.  Nearly every suburban town in the Denver area has one or several, while even tiny mountain hamlets support these brew producing outposts.

The SG partook in quite a few of these throughout last year, and while I’m no beer snob or even a huge connoisseur, many are worth of mention.

Post Opening Day, the SG Crew ventured to Our Mutual Friend Brewing.  Hipster is the operative word here, but there was no record scratch as the crew walked in in Rox gear.  Beers are tasty and nothing overly fancy décor wise, with a nice laid back vibe and even “bring your own vinyl” days.

Back in the day, North Denver was simply called “North Denver” but now the area is “The Highlands” and further divided into “LoHi” and such.  In one of those areas is Prost Brewing.  A great summer spot, myself and seven time SG winner TDub spent a few German style beers watching college football at their communal tables.

Dipping into the central mountains, any true Coloradoan knows of Salida.  A riverside town with some great arts and great bar/restaurant scene.  I ventured on the requisite town bike to Moonlight Pizza, which also brews their own beers.  A slice and cold beer in their outdoor area with a late summer mountain vibe was memorable.

It’s been there for years, but Southern Sun in Boulder was the perfect post-CU Spring Game stop.  Tasty beers and even tastier entrees.  The décor is very Boulder-ish and service is uber-friendly.

I tagged along with three time SG winner JL Smooth on an all-encompassing Boulder craft tour.  Stop one was Fate Brewing, which had good beers and great appetizers.  Wasn’t your typical beer fan vibe, as there’s a family setting and a great patio.  Stop two was a beer fan honey hole: J Wells Brewing, a tiny nanobrewery in an industrial park.  Where we were served by, who else, J Wells.  The last two spots were Sanitas and Wild Woods, the first with a great outdoor area and the latter with a tasty beer selection.

It wasn’t all breweries in 13, as some old standard bar/restaurants caught the SG eye.  One of those was Ernie’s Pizza Bar in the Sunnyside neighborhood.  Reinvented over the past couple years, Ernie’s has great Italian cuisine and an extensive beer menu.

High above Nederland stands the tiny enclave of Rollinsville, blink and you might miss it.  But a quick turn into the “main drag” and you’ll see the venerable Stage Stop Inn.  Bright and roomy, complete with art, great all-day breakfast food, and a nice beer selection, it is the perfect lazy afternoon resting point.

Video gamers have flocked to 1Up in LoDo for tourneys and the like, but even us imbibers can appreciate their cold beers and old school games.  A great place on a hot Rockies’ day for a cold beer and some Skee Ball or Donkey Kong.

On the other end of the LoDo spectrum is the Viewhouse.  Massive and mainly open, the Viewhouse has the standard pub fare and cold beers of all flavors in the shadow of Coors Field.  Its giant backyard draws the pseudo Vegas daytime crowd, drinkers, and those looking to soak the Colorado sunshine.

A family summer vacation took us to Grand Lake and during nap times I was able to walk to the Lariat Saloon on the fabled Grand Lake Boardwalk.  A true dive bar that doesn’t really cater to the tourist crowd, I enjoyed a simple Coors Original.  Apparently it’s an older bar with quite the history, but was more interested in a nice conversation with the bartender and regulars.

The same trip saw a more family friendly trip to Brickhouse 40 in Granby.  A restored 40 year old brick building, it has decent food, a great interior, and cold beers.  The kids were giddy from a horseback riding session and colored away, while Mrs Commish and I babbled about who knows what in a rare lunch without endless under-five year old questions and concerns.  It was a memorable afternoon, and that’s what most of these bar trips create.  You’ll remember the conversations, the people, and the funny stories from across the thousands of watering holes in this great state.  Cheers!

2012 Pack: Top CO Beer Spots

I don’t spend as much time traversing the metro and the state as years past checking out new beer spots. Two kids and all that stuff gets in the way (most bars frown upon high chairs among the beer taps.)

But I still made it to a few to highlight for the year of 2012 that is nearly a distant memory, you know, being three whole weeks ago.

Local micro-breweries seemed to popping up all over, some small enough to be smaller than a micro. On Denver's far-Eastern fringe, Caution Brewing opened up amongst a non-descript industrial park., complete with a Space Invaders game and a tasty blonde ale. Further north in my hometown, Big Choice Brewing opened in another industrial area with more tasty beers, a small bar area and a TV room upstairs. Keep going up US36 and a turn into Louisville will find Gravity Brewing, with one of the longest bars I’ve seen in quite some while and food available through a small window from the American Legion lodge next door.

Staying in Louisville a trip to Lucky Pie is a must, with their great pizza and ever changing beer lineups. Spent a hot summer afternoon for former Slushy Gutter Winner Juck’s bday there, where the kiddos could play in their fenced in “front yard.” Fast forward a couple months and my own bday celebration there was somewhat muted with a freak early October cold front but fun nonetheless.

The mountains got theirs in 2012, staring with Eddyline Brewing in Buena Vista, where we stopped post NCAA tourney in Albuquerque for a craft brew and hearty grub. Further up the way in Carbondale is Carbondale Beer Works, in a former post office where me and Slushy Gutter Winner TDub stopped for a cold beer on a hot summer day. Winter Park might not be the top summer destination, but a stop at The Library for one of their beers is a must, as me and the beautiful Mrs Commish learned on a lazy WP Beer Festival weekend.

Colorado’s spots are getting wise and adding more outdoor areas to drink and one of the best Boulder County has to offer is Oskar Blues Homemade Liquid and Solids in Longmont. The mammoth backyard is a perfect spot for families and enjoying their huge beer list. Staying in BoCo, Centro on the west end of Boulder’s Pearl Street may be known for their mojitoes but I managed a Ska Mexican Loggers on their quaint outdoor bar. Fellow CU fans have to venture to LoDo for an early season game at Blake Street Tavern, where the outdoor area will occasionally feature a huge outdoor screen and are very Black and Gold friendly.

Meanwhile back in Denver’s Central Platte Valley is the Denver Beer Company and their beers and rotating food trucks, where I spent a scorching June afternoon watching the gentrification pass by. Over off Tennyson is Local 46, which was once a wayward dive bar but now features art on the walls and a live music. A skip away and across from Sloan’s Lake is GB Fish And Chips, where they’ll fry up anything and offer cheap PBRs (among other more traditional English brews) with soccer games on the telly.

While I certainly got in a fair share of LoDo’s, Old Chicagos, and other chains, I try to highlight the local spots, and one of those spots is Right Coast Pizza in old Wheat Ridge, locally flavored and laid back. Took the family there over the holidays, and while my youngest daughter goo-goo’ed and made faces at us, my oldest sang to her heart’s content and colored, with my wife enjoying a few seconds of peace and not wiping boogers or grabbing something from the diaper bag. I sipped on my cold one and watched other families in the Holiday spirit knowing there was no other place I’d rather be and no other people I’d rather be with. Enjoy these places not so much for greasy food, fancy chairs or the bartender with the tight shirt, but the memories and people you’re there with... Cheers.

Check the ID - past top beer spots:

2006 List, 2007 List, 2008 List, 2009 List, 2010 List, 2011 List

Christmas SG Style

Christmas is the SG House and with it comes the tree and all the trimmmings. Like many readers, one may wonder: "what is hanging on the SG Christmas Tree?"  Falling in line with the pillars we rep here, let's take a look...

-CU Ornaments: 15 - Yes, the number of ornaments on the tree outnumbers the wins by the football team over the last four seasons.

-Beer Ornaments: 5 - The favorite is El Boracho ornamnent, which is described as "Mexican or Chicano slang for a drunkard."  Si, pass mas cereveza...Feliz Navidad.

-Rockies Ornaments: 1 - There was two, but one broke over the long storage season.  Kind of like the actual team.

-Nuggets Ornaments: 1 - Surprisingly equal to the number of outside jumpers hit by the team last night.  However, there are a couple gifts wrapped in Nuggets' wrapping paper.  If only the team played that tight of defense.

-Broncos Ornaments: 2 - One of them is a John Elway figurine that is missing his right foot.  The since deceased cat bit it off some years ago.  Damn cat was always a Chargers fan.

-Hip Hop Ornaments: 0 - Always thought a Krylon can on top of the tree might be a nice touch

RELATED: De La Soul f/ Redman - "Oooooh" - ("all my goodies out from under the tree, except the CDs of shiny-suit rappers and flossin emcees who fail at takin it to rhyme degrees")

Scoot On By

Eazy E once said "fuck the car, I do a mother fucking walk-by." For two Boulder drunks, the next step up was a scooter-by. And, further expanding on Eazy's violence, they decided to use bear repellent.

Only in Boulder.

It seems the two assailants had been drinking all day for the holiday when their vitriol over a perceived theft lead them to another block on The Hill. Not knowing which specific house on the block was the culprit, they decided to spray up the whole block. Down for ya neighborhood.

I never been sprayed with bear repellent but if I'm chilling with some July 4th corn on the cob it's probably not something that adds flavor.

The two sprayers hit up a house and a frat house yard before the spray reversed course in the wind (damn pesky physics) and doused themselves. Somewhere a bear is laughing in irony.

RELATED: Cypress Hill - "Throw Ya Hands In The Air"

Been Five Years Since Ya Last Beer

Five years ago, some friends of mine. Memorial Day is a special holiday here at the SG. One, it is the start of Summer, and this crap is called Slushy Gutter Summer. But it also marks the beginning of the summer drinking season. And no more was that on display than it was five short years ago, when I expanded on the original "Slushy Gutter Summer" (me drinking 528 beers in a summer) into the 2007 version where the SG Crew tried to gulp down 5280 beers in the summer.

You can reminisce about it right here, and we promise Pete Rock won't get mad at you.

Thinking back, doing the math, seeing the numbers, it stands pretty impressive. That's a lot of hooch. Enough to keep the frat house going for a weeks. Or a Charlie Sheen party.

Fast forward from that summer and here we are five years older and definitely not any wiser. There have been no calls to get the band back together and frankly that's a good thing. The odds of us pulling off the 5280 mark would be steeper than the Rockies winning the NL pennant. Our livers are tired, some tastes have gone to other spirits, and more importantly, enough kids have going the SG Crew family to power a small sweat shop.

5280 beers was so 2007. 2012? We could reach it if Juicky Juices, Sprites, and Capri Suns were included. Slushy Gutter, indeed...

RELATED: Pete Rock - "Tru Master"

Bathrooom Bar Art #8

FOUND BY: Commish CH
WHERE: Albuquerque, NM

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2011 Tell Em: Top CO Beer Spots

Euclid Hall- I go way back with this space, as back in the day it was the old school Soapy Smiths. Make no mistake in 2011, there's nothing old school about it. Tons of great beer on tap, good food plates and a young hip crowd. But it ain't all uppity: they mix in the old Hip Hop (heard Nas' "New York State of Mind" and more) with the music selections.

Hops and Pie- The North Denver Tennyson neighborhood continues to evlove and Hops and Pie lends to the new feel. The delicious, yet nothing too fancy, pizza pairs perfectly with the neighborhood feel. The vast array of craft brews on tap attract the beer elite, families, and SG crew.
Patrick O'Carroll's Pub- Just down the road is this quaint Irish pub. Sample all the Irish beer favorites, plus American "nostalgic" selections for $2 (PBR, Hamms, Strohs, Olympia) and drink standbys. Yet the food is not the standard pub fare, try the extensive appetizer selections. The Colcannon (fried mashed potatoes) go perfect with your PBR or Guiness.

Lulu's- While Louisville might conjure up images of suburbia, they've managed to keep a real downtown strip alive. One of the most unique additions is LuLu's on the south end. Built in an old service station, the joint mixes too-die-for BBQ, canned beer (try the off brand ), and a nice "backyard" complete with baggo. Perfect for those lazy summer nights.

Biker Jims- The popular gourmet hot dog cart is now permanent fixture in the Coors Field area. A mix of sit down service with counter service gives it a casual feel. Get there early on game day, as the line for their unique dogs (Southwest Buffalo and Jalapeno to name a few) and ice cold Coors Light is out the door.

Arvada Beer Company- Sparse is a word to describe this new microbrewery in the emerging Old Town Arvada. No food avaliable, but you are welcome to bring in any foor of your own. No fancy or folksy crap on the walls. What they do make is mouth watering fresh beers. From the
Ralston Golden Lager to the Water Tower Wheat and the other offerings are all sure to please.

The Pullman- No SG list would be official without a Glenwood Springs cold one, and the newest spot in the Colorado tourist spot is the Pullman. On a key riverfront spot, this trendy eatery doesn't skimp on the drinks. Sit in the front and watch the tourists go by with a nice local craft beer selction as well as the mass produced stalwarts.

The Old Man- Back in the day this was Yogis, and after that it was the hopping shithole Roosters. Saved from the Wal Mart wrecking ball the space underwent a transformation and became The Old Man. Adorned with pictures of (what else) fathers (and a nice Denver Gold sticker) this joint serves up ice cold cans of Keystone, serves great smoked BBQ, and has a selection of bar games and a jumping patio.

The Old Man happenned to be the first place Mrs Commish and I were able to go solo (read: without kids) when she got the drinking legs back after our second daughter's arrival. Looking back, probably my favorite couple hours of the year. (Note: we also brought the enitre fam to the re-opened venerable Red Ram in Georgetown during Christmas time. My little one's first tavern visit!)

I list a ton of great places in Colorado, a bunch of great music from this year, and some of the most memorable sports events. But the simple act of sitting down and sharing a cold one with your loved ones and friends simply cannot be beat. As always with this post, big ups to the SG Fam for 2012. CHeers.

(related: shirts with the above design available here)

Drinking in the day, better than Trip Advisor:
2006 List, 2007 List, 2008 List, 2009 List, 2010 List

Bathroom Bar Art #5

FOUND BY: Commish CH
WHERE: Boulder, CO at Rio Grande Restaurant & Bar

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Boulder Playboy Party

Things are looking up at Dear Ol' CU; a new football coach, a hoops run into the NIT final four in New York, a national championship in skiing, and now a new #1 ranking.

Looks like us tree-hugging, granola grubbing, non-washing, snowboarding, blunt burning, hackey sack playing, Grateful Dead jamming trust funders free spirits have reclaimed the coveted top spot in the almighty Playboy Party School rankings! (50 medical mj dispensaries in the city limits? That'd make Cheech, Chong, Red, Meth, and Willie Nelson blush.)

So suck it Texas. You and your weak Big 12 little sisters have fun at your get togethers drinking fruit punch and playing Twister. We've got couches to burn and kegs after kegs to drink.

RELATED: Tha Alkaholiks - "Only When I'm Drunk"

Down By Law

A T-bone steak, cheese eggs and Welch's grape...

Our great state of Colorado has some of the strangest liquor sales laws. The past few days have seen our new Guv, a former brewer himself, step into the fray and start going Chicago-style politics on the suds rules. Of course, opponents of the Guv and the other side of the issue have collectively pissed their pants and the wheels of government have once again turned a simple issue into a quagmire.

The gist (that word is kind of creepy, a little too close to bodily function) of the matter is the testing of beer at bars as opposed to convenience stores. Why not have some fun with it? Incorporate a drinking game into the controversary.

DRINK ______ IF:

-1 if while you're at a bar the white coat scientists beat up the bartender to test his low alcohol beer.
-1 if you join in the fight simply to get free brew.
-3 if after a few beers you can say 'Hickenlooper' five times fast.
-5 if after a few beers you can work 'Hickenlooper' into a Ghostface-style rhyme.
-2 if you get a C-store clerk to comprehensively break down his favorite double IPA beer.
-1 if after the white coat scientists test your beer and you say "well, am I pregnant?"
-5 if you mistakenly identify the scientist as Bill Nye.
-3 if you mistakenly identify the scientist as C. Everett Koop.
-1 if your local C-store gets shipments messed up and is doling out Coors flavored Icees.
-2 if you use the testing instrument to mainline the beer into your veins.
-1 if you are so blitzed that your bartender serves you water and tells you it's new water-flavored low alcohol beer.
-8 if you pick Hickenlooper or the scientists to win your NCAA brackets.

RELATED - Above The Law - "Untouchable"

The Points Locked Down

COLORADO SPORTS:

-Will the lockout affect the Denver Broncos negatively? Does Charlie Sheen like snorting drugs into every orifice? One simple fact about football is that you need a defensive line to play it, and right now the Donks don't have many bodies after cutting Justin Bannan and Jamal Williams. Two, unless you are running some colliegiate style offense, it might be wise to have a tight end, and after cutting Dan Graham, they are low on those too. Think young Mr Tebow might benefit from coaching at OTAs rather than some dude in a windbreaker at a "training center"? And where will Knowshon Moreno rather be hurt? The practice field at Dove Valley or at the local park in Athens Georgia?

HIP HOP:
-The only MC to ever rock the padlock look was Naughty By Nature's Treach, and given his stature, no one was gonna give him any crap over it. (Did Naughty By Nature save East Coast Hip Hop when they dropped in 1991? I've never really understood that argument, but they certainly proved it could be commercially viable, as they rode the wave for nearly four years. They might not have saved it, but they helped a rebirth of the region with their style and rugged sound and look.) I always felt Treach never got his due as one of the era's top lyricists, as he proved his flow was unmatched (peep his verse on two non-Naughty records: D-Nice's "Time To Flow" and Queen Latifah's "Rough", where he effortlessly steals the attention from the title MCs.)

BEER:
-Today starts a stretch of boozing events to turn a simple bender into a full blown trip to rehab. Fat Tuesday and plenty of "show me your titties" moments descends today, followed by the St Paddy's Day Parade, the NCAA tourney, and the actual St. Patrick's Day. SG recommended beers: for Fat Tuesday Louisiana brewed Abita; for the Parade you need to go stealth and pour it into a paper coffee cup and the mass brews taste like butt when in those. Go with something a wee bit stronger like a Killians Red, which is still cheap enough to swill lare quantities. For the tourney when you are sitting in front of the TV you gotta roll with someting that fits in your fat slob on the couch lifestyle, say a tall can or 40 of something. Finally you can step it up on St Paddy's Day and rock the Guiness or mass pints of Harp. SG has it on lock, see you in detox.

RELATED: Tone Tank and Scott Thorough - "Forties"

Bathroom Bar Art #4

FOUND BY: Commish CH
WHERE: Scottsdale, AZ

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'10 Again: Top Colorado Beers Spots

Alley Bar- There's a reason that this Highlands bar is called the Alley Bar- because it used to be an alley. They simply threw a roof over it, put in some ornate decor, and cheap drinks. Located next to a popular pizza place Zio Romolos, this joint has a laid back vibe like most of the neighborhood.

Tiki Bar- Whenever these tropical themed bars come into our mountain state, it just screams cheesy. This bar gets a pass because it's on the Lake Dillon waterfront. Suck down local brewery Pug Ryan's micros (Morningwood Wheat is a fave) and watch the Colorado mountain summer go by.

Golden City Brewery- Take a microbrewery and put in a house and use the yard as the seating area, that's what GCB is all about. The "backyard" has communal picnic tables for you to get to know your fellow drinker, with entertainment usually a dude witha guitar, a couple dogs roaming around, and good beers.

Vintage Moose- You pass it everytime on the way to the slopes in Idaho Springs: it's the roadside bar (in the parking lot of the behemoth Beua Jo's) with the big moose antlers offers a completely redone interior and cold drinks. An ample patio area is great for summer evenings as Interstate 70 goes by at 80mph.

Highland Tap- Not the biggest burger critic, but my dining companion offers it was the best burger they've ever had in the city. This new joint also offers a Wednesday running club and other hot deals. Plenty of TVs and a good selection of micros and old stanbys make it a desirable sports location on a lazy Sunday.

Fainting Goat- Nestled in among the offices and shops on Broadway, the Fainting Goat has a patio that is a must for your summer plans. But get there early, because the rooftop patio is smaller than most of the massive offerings the city has to offer. You won't be sorry sucking down ice cold CLs as the city bellows beneath.

Skips Pourhouse- History seems to ooze from this joint on Carbondale's main drag, from the intricate bar, to the classic music blaring from the jukebox (which has a small dance congregation when we were there on a random Saturday afternoon.) This is a Original Coors type place to co-mingle with immigrants, hippies, and cowboys. Don't forget the Rocky Mountain Oysters either.

Motherloded Tavern- This is one of those classic bars that didn't meet a piece of decor it didn't like, and there's plenty (love the old TVs on the patio) on display at this Breckenridge watering hole. The trendy ski crowd or summer touristy types seemed absent most of the time, so swill their cold beers without pretense.

Wild Mountain Smoke House- Keep going straight through Boulder and you'll eventually end up in the mountain hamlet of Nederland, and belly onto the Wild Mountain. Sit on the patio with one of their handcrafted beers with the air a bit more nippy, the grass seems a bit greener, and the people of 'Ned' are a bit friendlier.

Old Louisville Inn- At one time this Irish bar was the center of violent protests of the miners who populated Louisville (bullet holes in the walls prove that.) The antique bar itself is from Leadville and is one of the state's oldest. Murals grace the wall painted by a local artist who was paid with a bar tab. Plenty of Boulder County brews on tap.

Red's Pub- This one is close to home, as in the Commish's home. The simple white cinder block bar with a few tables, a few beers on tap, frozen pizzas and popcorn, and friendly staff was a old school throwback with the kitsch of trying to be. Unfortunately, progress is coming in the form of the new road and Red's is shuttered. Too much these days the little bars are disappearing from our lives while the "fun emporiums" pop up around.

I went to Red's now and then with friends (it was our stop after Dan Hawkins' first loss to Montana State), or with my decades old Fantasy Football league, or with my favorite bar hopper, my lovely wife (Red's was still a bit gully to trust it to host my beautiful baby girl.) I'll miss it but won't shed too many tears because the most important thing is the memories, friendships, and loves that places like this create and nuture. Big ups to the SG Massive for 2011.

Bar Bathroom Art #3

FOUND BY: SG Crew
WHERE: Burlington, Colorado Welcome Center

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Bar Bathroom Art #2

FOUND BY: Commish CH
WHERE: Morrison, CO at the Morrison Inn

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GABF Represent

Commish CH, current Slushy Gutter Winner T-Dub, and former Slushy Gutter Winner JL Smooth attended the Great American Beer Fest in Denver last night. Some highlights:

-The line to get in is long. Like longer than the line to see Empire Strikes Back in 81. I ask my crew what would make the waiting go faster. One says "beer" the other says "strippers." That could actually be the answer to all of life's ails.

-To pass the line time we could do the Pipelayer dance?

-5:30: Festival open, a large cheer. The line starts to move swiftly. Somewhere the TSA at the airport feels a shudder.

-There's been 14 Slushy Gutters awarded; between the three of us we have nine of them. We curse the other five winners.

-I see a group of Juggalos. Do they serve Faygo beer?

-There's a dude with his two year old at the festival. As a fellow dad I am torn between shunning him or giving him Dad of the Year.

-The Humpty Dance is being played. Seriously, Hump how did you pull chicks at Burger King? And why BK, was Wendy's closed? McDonald's being remodeled? Why you fronting on Arby's Hump?

-Beer #1 is a selection from Colorado Boy brewery. Colorado Boy, sounds like a gay travel agency, but is a good ice breaker.

-Pretzel necklaces are the rage at the festival. They help cleanse the mouth and keep your belly full. Me and Smooth sport them while T-Dub is jealous. We meet up with our man Father Tuck, who offers hugs and crushes half my pretzels.

-Smooth and T-Dub are popping boners over a beer called Pliny the Elder. While they wait in line, I scoop up three other beers. Opportunity, son.

-I've exhausted most of my pretzels, and I as a take it off T-Dub tries to snatch it and it falls and smashes to the ground. Can you call party foul on that? Or Pretzel Foul?

-I sample a chile beer and surprisingly it is very tasty. Ole!

-Brooklyn Brewery is there and I can't help mumble "Where's Brooklyn at!?" They are not impressed.

-There's lots of dudes taking notes of all the beers they drink. Probably some nerdy blogger. I mean who takes notes for a blog...oh wait.

-The brewery that does Olde English is there. I scan the memory banks and determine that I haven't had a OE since 1994. Damn straight, I got me one. Somewhere the 94 Commish is hollering.

-I sample a Key Lime Pie Beer. Holy crap, you can taste the lime, the marshmallow and the graham crackers. I feel like I'm sitting on a porch on a summer day.

-Time to grub and I get a chicken sandwich. This isn't a standard sando, there might well be a whole damn chicken on this bun. Second wind has arrived.

-We're in another line when I dude with a beard with long hair and a beard blows past everyone claiming he only has to wash his hands. The janitor yells "hey, ya'll Jesus has to keep his hands clean, make way!"

-Smooth and TDub are in line while me and Tuck are making fun of 'Fedora Guys', which there seems to be a lot of. TDub strikes a conversation with them and we find out they are from our hometown and actually cool dudes. Asshole alert and it points right at me.

-There's a few drunks in the crowd, but most of the drunks are working behind the tables serving the beer. Now if that could only apply to everyone's job.

-A chubby dude is waving to his friends across the aisle and T-Dub waves back. They aren't amused. Beer: makes most people friendly, unless you're fat.

-The floor is getting slick as people clear out, so slick we think about rocking some genie pants and doing some Hammer moves.

-A server is reaching drunkeness. How do I know? She's dressed as a pirate and pouring our glasses while it rests in her cleavage.

-I've knocked out the OE, so I double my pleasure with a PBR.

-Our ride is en route. We get a "beer two minute warning" and we all successfully navigate the two minute drill to score a beer TD.

RELATED: Tha Alkaholiks - "Make Room"

Bar Bathroom Art #1

FOUND BY: Commish CH
WHERE: Downtown Idaho Springs, CO public restroom

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Firework Points

You played your hand lost track of your plan
When I show up I blow up, end of story my man...

COLORADO SPORTS
-High time for the Rockies to get serious with a 10-game homestand, big crowds for the weekend, their ace on the mound on Sunday, that dude from the UPS Whiteboard commercials pitching tonight, and the division leaders coming in right after the Giants leave town. Last night's game is almost a glimpse of what the Rockies need most nights: Dexter Fowler leading off with a bang, solid starting pitching, stout bullpen work, and Huston Street throwing down the hammer in the ninth. The only thing missing is Tulo and Hawpe in the middle of the lineup, and anything from the 3rd base position, as Melvin "Hands of Stone" Mora and Ian Stewart have provided little more than sparkler power fireworks.

HIP HOP
-The SG had Homeboy Sandman's The Good Sun on lock for most of June, a tremendous assembly of playful rhymes, artsy and hard hitting beats, timely cameos (Fresh Daily in particular on "Table Cloth,") and the never tired rhymes railing on commercial Hip Hop ("Gucci, Fendi, Prada? Yada yada yada," he raps on "Yeah I Can Ryhme Though.") The Queens MC brings together an eclectic cast of producers including Pyscho Les, Ski Beatz, and Ben Grimm. The later lacing the unique "Mean Mug" where Home Sand goes against the grimey faces so prevalent in the game, warning the mean muggers might have "muscle strain" later in life. The lone posse cut “The Things They Carried” sees Daniel Joseph, John Robinson, and Sandman simply going for theirs by describing what is in their pockets. It's that easy, yet they make it so listenable. Sandman also provides some deeper, more personal rhymes, among those are "Angels With Dirty Faces" in which he takes the perspective of a homeless man.

BEER
-Remember in the old school days when your Pops and his crew would chill at the local Fourth of July BBQ with their peel-top beers, big upping the USA, and shitting on the old Iron Curtain? Maybe the holiday concept of freedom meant more back then because there were so many more worldwide who didn't enjoy any. Fast forward to the 21st Century, and the Russians buy our hoops teams, export hundreds of buxom, long legged tennis stars, and still seem to wear track suit tops wherever they are. And how are we finally repaying them? The smoooooooooooth taste of Coors Light, which is now available in Moscow. The fine Coors folks seem determined to crack the Ruskies beer appetite; perhaps a CL flavored vodka would've been more appropriate? So this Fourth (as SG Alum Broz once said) as you are enjoying your Mexican beer, Chinese fireworks, and German brauts, remember your Pops and his cronies, who kicked some commie ass, brooke down their walls, and satisfied their thirst with some of Golden's finest! USA USA USA!

Bolder Boulder Beers

I cold chill at a party in a b-boy stance
And rock on the mic and make the girls wanna dance...

Yesterday was the annual Bolder Boulder 10K road race, which has become tradition in the Commish household over the last few years. Why? I asked myself that as a trudged up the final hill to Folsom Field, more looking like a shuffling 80 year old than Frank Shorter. The BB is the "great Colorado race", as I sat in the stands afterwards and scanned the joy on the people's faces, as youngsters beamed as Mom or Dad finished. Runners adorned their bibs with Memorial Day tributes to family and friends who have served their country. A wide variety of characters along the course, from Elvis impersonators, belly dancers, people giving away bacon ("the real Powerbar"), college kids offering free beer, and aging hippies. All that is great and adds to the race's charm, but my favorite part is the lone Michelob Ultra each runenr is awarded after the race, for that watered down (and I mean just a step above water, Michelob Ultra makes Coors Light taste like Guiness) slim can is the only time I can legally drink a cold one in Folsom's confines. That, my people, is why I run.

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