2014 on the Scene: Best CO Sports Moments

1 – PFM and Pot Roast come up big as Broncos beat the Patriots and advance to their seventh Super Bowl.

2 – Broncos get a bit of redemption from the Raven debacle by beating the Chargers and moving on to the AFC Championship.

3 – The CU Buffs men’s hoops team gets selected to their third straight NCAA tourney

4 – Peyton Manning breaks Brett Favre’s all time TD record in a game versus San Fran.

5 – Rockies clean their front office house and get rid of Dan O’Dowd and Bill Geivett.

6 – CU Buffs win a road game against the mighty UMass Minuteman in Foxboro.

7 - Avs and new coach Patrick Roy reclaim the Central Division title and return to playoffs.

8 - Kenneth Faried makes the all-tourney team as the USA claims gold at the World Hoops Cup.

9 - Vail’s Mikaela Shiffrin stars at the skiing portion of the Sochi Olympics.

10 – Broncos clinch the AFC West for the fourth straight year by beating the Chargers in San Diego.

BACK TO THE ESSENCE:

2013 Best
2012 Best of
2011 Best
2010 Tops
2009 Tops
2008 Best
2007 Tops
2006 Best

Rockies Go Decktober

Who doesn't love a good party deck? Chilling in the sun with a cold beverage, yacking it up wth the crew, checking out the hotties. Yep, the days of Summer are complete with a good deck. Although when said deck is at a Major League Baseball game, it throws somewhat of a big splinter into the normal deck experience. (back in the day, I used to get a kick out of simply erasing a few lines and changing "deck" into "dick" on restaurant and bar signage, ie "Come and enjoy our fully stocked outdoor bar and dick!"

Yes, the Brothers Monfort announced the complete transformation of upper right field into a party deck. Because you want partyers up there rather than, say, baseball fans. Ever trapsed up to upper right field? There's a reason it is called "upper", Sherpas and/or billy goats may be sighted. Climbing that high to "party" should mix well with alcohol and sun dresses.

The standard rage from Purp fans is to put the deck money (again, do some erasing and it's "dick money", which may be correct when discussing ownership) into the product on the field. But Brother Dick is ready for you pesky fans and slaps back that the renovation cash is coming from the stadium district. Ah yes, the stadium district. Anyone who thinks the stadium district and team that plays in said stadium aren't intertwined probably thinks ESPN and ABC are completely separate networks. Dick Boy also adds that the most this will cost the team is a "one year contract on a utility player." Because why would a team accustomed to playing long games with plenty of pinch hitters need one of those?

So while enjoying one of your 50 plus Colorado microbrews (standard microbrew at a tasting room is $5+, so at the stadium, just be prepared to give them your watch as payment), talking to some dude in a pair of boat shoes and a day glo tanktop, and ogling some chick dancing to "Gasolina", remember this is National League Baseball at its finest.

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Winless on Blake

Here in Colorado we've had some crappy teams over the last 20 years.  In between Dikembe and Mr Lala the Nuggets had some gawd awful squads.  Check the Colorado Buffaloes football team this past year as well as some of their hoops teams in the day.  See the Avs and their quest for the number one pick this year.  Even the beloved Donks had some stinkers here and there.

And then we have the local National League professional baseball club.  In their 20 years of existence, they have had some real dog sh*t teams.  This year should be the steamiest pile they've ever had at 20th and Blake.

Speaking of dog crap, in the nearly seven years this blog has been around, we've never offered a season prediction...until now.

The assortment of laughable pitchers, veteran retreads and AAA caliber hurlers will help with the historic hapless season.  And we know there'll we an injury or two or three.  Tulo nursing something starting in May and lingering all year.  Then there will be the veteran trade offs.  Cuddyer in Detroit, Chris Nelson in Washington.  Carlos Gonzalez - gasp - in Toronto?  Everything that will go wrong in Purple and Black will go wrong.  Taps running dry, the clocktower getting struck by lightning, Dinger's costume getting ate by rabid coyotes.

The Rockies 2013 record?  0-162. 

RELATED: Fat Lip - "What's Up Fat Lip" - ("...been a loser just about all my life...")

Used To Call Me Fatso

Denver has had its fair share of ‘Fat’ people come through the 303 (and/or 720, because we always seem to forget about the 720 brothers) over the years. In honor of Fat Tuesday, let’s take a look:

-Fat Lever- Lost in the Magic point guard hype of the mid-80s was the Nuggets own PG, one Lafayette Lever, affectionately known as Fat. (I’ve tried for years to shorten Lafayette, Colorado to just ‘Fat’ but no one really get’s it.) Lean, quick, and playing long, Fat consistently had more triple doubles than his western conference Showtime counterpart. His rebounding prowess was perhaps one of the best that a true point has offered in the last 25 years.

-Brian Bohannon- Baseball players usually take the cake (pun intended) for being the most atheistically unappealing fatsos in the sports realm. The Rockies had their fair share over the years (Dante Bichette was no stranger to the buffets) but pitcher Brian Bohannon certainly was the most rotund. Dude looked more like a radiator salesman than a front line pitcher. Rumor was that he could not have a rosin bag because he mistook it for a bag of powdered sugar.

-Raymond Felton- Look, the guy was in the NBA and plays at a fast level, but he’s still got one of those faces that look if you take a pin to it, you’ll get 30 seconds of deflation.

-Wade Phillips- Colorado’s coaches over the last 30 years have been the thin variety- Shanny, Jim Tracy, Dan Reeves, Bob Hartley, Dan Issel. Even the bigger dudes are just that: big husky dudes. John Fox, George Karl, even Don Baylor, who most resembled Grimace the McDonald’s shake character. Not Donks’ coach Wade Phillips though, he was of the overweight variety. Slap a key ring on that guy and you have the high school maintenance man.

-Mike Horan- He was actually very skinny; but tell me that mustache and weird perm he had rocking wasn’t creepy even back then. Exact type of dude who’d be rolling Bourbon Street chanting “show me your t*ts!”

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Christmas SG Style

Christmas is the SG House and with it comes the tree and all the trimmmings. Like many readers, one may wonder: "what is hanging on the SG Christmas Tree?"  Falling in line with the pillars we rep here, let's take a look...

-CU Ornaments: 15 - Yes, the number of ornaments on the tree outnumbers the wins by the football team over the last four seasons.

-Beer Ornaments: 5 - The favorite is El Boracho ornamnent, which is described as "Mexican or Chicano slang for a drunkard."  Si, pass mas cereveza...Feliz Navidad.

-Rockies Ornaments: 1 - There was two, but one broke over the long storage season.  Kind of like the actual team.

-Nuggets Ornaments: 1 - Surprisingly equal to the number of outside jumpers hit by the team last night.  However, there are a couple gifts wrapped in Nuggets' wrapping paper.  If only the team played that tight of defense.

-Broncos Ornaments: 2 - One of them is a John Elway figurine that is missing his right foot.  The since deceased cat bit it off some years ago.  Damn cat was always a Chargers fan.

-Hip Hop Ornaments: 0 - Always thought a Krylon can on top of the tree might be a nice touch

RELATED: De La Soul f/ Redman - "Oooooh" - ("all my goodies out from under the tree, except the CDs of shiny-suit rappers and flossin emcees who fail at takin it to rhyme degrees")

Legalize and I Advertise

How Colorado legalizing the chronic will affect the various sports teams:

--"Coach Embree?  There's a Mr. Ricky Williams on line one asking if we are hiring?"

--The old 'D' Bronco logo?  The smoke coming out of the horse's nostrils?  Yep.

--CU Buffs award MJ leafs on the back of their helmets for touchdowns, big tackles, interceptions, and mastering a six foot bong.

--Coors Field humidor will keep your weed fresh and green for later use.

--All those charity "Bowl A Thon" events take on new meaning.

--Training tables consisting of chili cheese nachos and cold pizza will force Frito Lay to hire dozens of new sales reps and drivers.

--Denver Nuggets?  Nuggets?  Nuggets (followed by 20 minutes of laughter)

--It just isn't the same coming out on the field to Cypress Hill as it was to AC/DC.

--NBA Players Association asks for expansion teams in every Colorado city over 50,000 people.

--His name is Rashaan Salaam, and today he is vindicated.

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Peyton Says Your Done

It's pretty cliche to say with the opening of Broncos' camp tomorrow, the Rockies season is effectively over to most people. But, with the opening of Broncos' camp tomorrow, the Rockies season is effectively over.

Some guy named Peyton Manning, the legal troubles on defense, the stocked WR corps, the Hall Of Famer at corner, even the tattoo'ed kicker, will trump anything the Purp do over these next two plus months.

There's dudes on the Rockies right now that aren't recognizable to the casual fan (save me the "they tore it up in Tulsa" argument. Exactly, Tulsa. Look outside, this ain't Tulsa.) And meanwhile the Rox we've gotten to know are somewhere on the DL abyss. The pitching? It cringes just to write that word.

While the Rox hang their hat on the stellar attendance at Coors Field despite the losing, keep an eye on that. You thin they're will be 30k on a Tuesday in September? Friday night games with real high school football and the kids back in school?

So to the Rockies, basically thanks for a completely lost 2012. One where even near 500 ball would keep in the mind of Colorado sports fans. See you in Spring Training. There's a pennant behind every palm tree.

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Four Man Weave

Four man rotation. 75 pitch counts. Losses. Seems like another Summer in Rox Land.

The Rox are trying to reinvent the wheel on a grand game that has only been going on for 150 plus years. This wheel needs to be ripped off and tossed in the junk yard.

Yes Jeremy Guthrie is a dud (if they trade him to Toronto does his ERA face the exchange rate and get even bigger?) and needs to go to the pen, but replace him in the rotation. You see, baseball is a funny game, and for the last generation every successful team has used five dudes as their starters. Get any average Joe from the minors, from an independent team, from some other team's scrap heap. Hell, call Tatum Bell at the cell phone kisosk and get him.

Yet the brass (a loose term when describing the Rox front office, a more apt term would be a few rungs down on the precious metals table. 'Dull aluminum'?) at 20th and Blake thinks four guys on a 75 pitch limit is the answer? 75 pitches will do wonders for the development of young pitchers who are trying to get into the flow of a MLB season.

The Purp will claim the new four man rotation is out of necessity. They have the wrong "ity" as it is obviously out of stupidity.

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Hella Bad

I'm livin' large as possible, posse unstoppable
Style topical, vividly optical...

Things just keep getting worse in Purp Land, as the Rockies have dropped six in a row and now stand a season "high" 13 games under 500 after finding another way to lose the A's last night. It seems everyday there's some number or stat demonstrating how bad this team really is. Let's look at a few:

--The starting staff ERA is the worse in baseball since 1930. That's 80 plus years filled with bad teams, expansion teams, steriod freaks, 1940 and 50s teams that served as trade partners to the Yankees, etc. The worse since 1930? We're talking the 30s through 70s when TV and scouting was nearly primitive compared to today and the Rockies are worse than every staff ever assmebled in eight decades.

--Troy Tulowitzki wasn't at the team phot a couple days back because he was rehabbing. A team official said he will be phot shopped in the pic. Can they phot shop in Matt Cain, Stephen Strasburg, and Cliff Lee too?

--The batters keep saying there's no division on the team between them and the pitchers. In my best Seth Meyers voice: "really?" You dudes go out and mash the f*ck out the ball like the humidor is unplugged and being used to grow medical marijuana and they crap their pants every night? No division? I'm not sure if the pitchers "area" at Coors clubhouse is away from the position players but if it is those dudes are like the jean jacket smoking stoner outcasts in high school.

--Rockies are 0-8 in interleague at home. Haven't won a game versus the way below average AL West, who have to bat their pitchers, in a NL park? 0-8 in interleague? Can the Yokomori Giants, Toledo Mud Hens, and the Stan's Bail Bonds Softball Goons get on that schedule?

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Clueless Dick

By now, Dick Monfort's (he of the fortune amassed from beef and lots of it) comments about the state of the Rockies are all over radio, TV, and the papers. The reaction from Rockies Nation has been a collective "WTF?" Many are calling to stay away from the games. But for a good number is that really an option? I'm not going to stay away from the fun that is Coors Field on a beautiful Colorado summer day or night.

Can social media influence the Rox brain trust? ("Brain" trust used loosely.) If Dick thinks Dan O'Dowd is the best GM is baseball, do we really think they even know how to log onto the internet? The same organization that f*cked up their 'net sale during the World Series that it became an almost bigger story than the team? They think "www" at 20th and Blake is the sound you make when exhaling.

Banners at the game? Not allowed, or the Purple Ushers and their gray hair will humiliate you.

Sagging ratings? Hah, those ads are prepaid! Merchandise sales? But this new red 'CR' cap with a giant MLB logo on the side is so gangsta.

So basically all of us suckers are left to sit through this crap that Dick and crew say is a good way to spend our money and time. Year of the Fan has turned into Year of getting bad baseball rammed up up our collective rears.

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Bees Coming Thru

The SG got off on a big tangent yesterday when a swarm of bees decided to settle just above the Rockies dugout. The bees were taken care of after a short delay (by a dude with a vaccum/Floobee hair cutting machine.)

At the time the Rockies were ahead, seemingly cruising to their third (gasp!) straight win.

The bees would get the credit. Much like the old Florida Panthers' rat and the Angels' rally monkey, the bees rep would grow bigger. The team would reel off some wins and get back into contention. Crucial moments at Coors you'd hear the buzz of a swarm over the PA. People would come dressed as bees. The bars around 20th and Blake would sell witty shirts ('Let It Bee'; 'Bee-lieve') to the masses. The SG would link up constant Wu-Tang videos in the RELATED link. Stuffed bees, honey tinged drinks, dudes dressed as beekeepers, the section abopve the bee site would be 'The Hive', Tommy Boy "bees!" quotes, a damn cultural phenomenom would carry the Rox all summer.

Then the Rockies went Rockies. Game over with another blown loss. These bees have lost their sting. Someone pass the Raid.

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Bynum Block A Thon

NUGGETS: We heard all weekend leading up to Game One that Andrew Bynum was the key. Bynum, Bynum, Bynum. And what happens? Bynum. Let's call him block head because he altered the Nuggets entire offensive scheme. The Powder Blue Patrol has fouls up the ying yang (Birdman is good for a few rather than growing a beard and getting a tat on the bench.) We all know Bynum isn't the most stable dude in the dome, so their only option might be to hack him up and hope he cracks.

BRONCOS: I go back to the days of the Draft on Tuesdays and bringing a transistor radio to elementary school, so the whole Draftapalooza thing is damn funny. grades, rankings, three days, whatever. That said, the Donks' draft was a very mundae "eh" from the masses. Joe Wolf's son will apparently be a new defesive tackle, some short Sproles-like dude is our thrid down guy now, and we took a QB in the first three picks. Which is weird because I thought we signed some QB this offseason? Hey, I heard that Osweiller is 6-7. Does he have any fouls for Bynum?

ROCKIES: Crazy Sunday at Coors Field saw Johan Santana turn back the clock and Todd Helton provide a memorable grand slam. But a lot of the chatter before the game was about Peyton Manning and Eric Decker taking BP. Apparently Decker crushed a couple dongs into the seats. So this Decker dude is a football stud, was a baseball standout in college, pals around with Peyton Manning, is sticking it to some singer dime piece, and models in his spare time. Yeah, Decker was that dude who you hated in high school. That said, yo Decker, how can I be down? Follow me on Twitter dog.

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Salt River Fights

The heckler of hip hop, hop to this one
I got more kid, they hate to miss one...

The Rockies v Ubaldo back and forth has finally boiled over with a benches clearing plunking of Tulo yesterday by the former ace. The once cherished Ubaldo is now an official "former player" hanging with the likes of Melo and Kyle Orton. A brief text convo between Commish CH and five time SG winner T-Dub sums up the feelings of the Rox fan base.

CH: Ubaldo plunked Tulo at SRF today. Got ugly.
TW: Wow!
CH: Ubaldo booed off field. Tulo heated. Benches emptied.
TW: I kind of feel bad for Ubaldo in a way. Granted he shouldn't have sulked last year as reported, but Tulo needs to put his money where his mouth is.
CH: Hit him intentionally. Fuck him. Smiley Drake looking two faced dick bag.
TW: I'm sure he did. Yeah, fuck him. Skip the beans and crush the rice.

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Handshake Brings All The Boys To The Yard

I make the music, that makes a posse ill
In they Jeeps or playin ball, or ready to chill...

The Rockies' and manager Jim Tracy agreed to a contract extension yesterday that was billed as a "handshake agreement" that will keep Tracy with The Purp "indefinitely."

A multi-billion dollar business and the Rox and their about-average manager (230-210 career with the team) agree to be tied to one another with a "handshake?" That seems just so wrong on every level, but the biggest question is what kind of "handshake" was employed?

I'd like to think it was the old school "double handshake." Think Jimmy Carter/Anwar Sadat/Yitzhak Rabin at Camp David. One extended hand isn't enough, Jim, I'm adding my free hand to convey how much your 230-210 career record means to us.

But maybe Tracy and Dan O'Dowd are a little more street savvy than we think. Maybe they employed the standard hanshake followed by a slick extra move. Did Tracy utter "nuff love" or "aight then" during the handshake? Maybe O'Dowd took it another step further and brought Tracy in for the seminal "Shake and Hug" moment.

Maybe they went off the board completely. Old school Washington Redskins "fun bunch" flying high five between Tracy, O'Dowd, and both Brothers Monfort.

Could anything be more dope than O'Dowd and Tracy going Milli Vanilli chest bump? Is one of them like Howie Mandel and a germophobe and have to go with the fist pound? Big trend in football now seems to be a jumping hip bump; can either of them get that high?

Given the strange circumstances of this "deal" we might never know what was used. Secret handshake.

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2011 Tell Em: Top CO Sports Moments

1- Tebow mania went into the beginning of meltdown mode when his 20 yard ramble beat the Jets. A national TV audience saw him and the Broncos get back to 500 and had every talking head from Bristol to Denver yapping. As play-by-play man Dave Logan simply asked as he crossed the goal line: “are you kidding me?”

2- The Chicago Bears came to town in mid-December with a stout defense and some hopes of the playoffs. Through three and a half quarters they almost gave the Broncos their first home shutout ever. Cue Tim Tebow and a 59 yard game-tying FG and 51 yard game-winner from Matt Prater and the Broncos stood at 8-5 and the Tebow Meltdown was in full effect

3- A shaky game by the opposing kicker and great defensive play by the Buffs in the first half lead to the end of their four year road streak with a win over Utah. The day-after-Thanksgiving upset prevented the Utes from appearing in the inaugural Pac-12 Championship and gave the Buffs some momentum going into the offseason.

4- After the Donks and their “traditional” offense laid an egg versus the Lions, the coaching staff went retro with Tim Tebow. Out were long passes and complex passes, in were option plays, QB draws, and straight rushes up the gut. A power game resulted in nearly 300 yards on the ground and the beginning of the Bronco win streak.

5- After the February deal of Carmelo Anthony to the Knicks, no one expected the Nuggets to do much of anything. What we saw though was spirited team-oriented basketball lead by the Knicks’ former players in Wilson Chandler, Raymond Felton, and Danilo Galinarri. Posting on the Western Conference’s best late records, the Nuggets again won 50 games.

6- The Buffs hoops team took a horrendous and suspicious NCAA snub and turned it into a long NIT run. With a veteran 21 win team lead by NBA lottery pick Alec Burks, they avoided a letdown and ran through their bracket as a top seed. The reward was a trip to Hoops Mecca, Madison Square Garden, where they fell in the semifinals in a classic game to Alabama.

7- The Rockies highlighted their stellar April by making quick work of the Cubs and their legions of invading fans with a sunny Colorado Sunday win 9-5. Talk of winning the West wasn’t “if” but “by how many.” Everything was clicking for the Purp; timely hitting, power numbers, steady pitching, and defense.

8-10- In no specific order select the following: the Broncos win versus the Chiefs in KC where they completed two passes; their “shootout” overtime win in Minnesota; or their miracle cover the onside kick win versus the Dolphins.

RELATED:
2010 Tops
2009 Tops
2008 Tops
2007 Tops
2006 Tops

Walk It Out

This is a battle rhyme in case you haven't noticed
You get replaced you get demoted

One of the most tired "traditions" in Colorado sports took place yesterday: the Rockies annual "Thank You" lap around Coors Field. The Purp should feel all the embarrassment of that tart who stayed over at your apartment back in the day and had to throw back on her beer and smoke stained gear from the night before take the seemingly endless morning march back to her car (while you, the ultimate gentleman, snoozed away and didn't even get up with her to offer her a breakfast Nutrigrain bar.)

Hey, lets walk around the field throwing cheap t-shirts to our suckers fans to thanks them for watching one of our most disappointing seasons in recent memory. Hey, kid in front row, high five this player. You don't know who he is because we just brought him up, or traded for him from Oakland, or maybe he's just a groundskeeper. Clap clap clap!

Also, we'll give away some special prizes, like bats and gloves. Normally we'd ship these to our Dominican academy because they belong to players who have no chance of being of here in 2012! Yeah! Nice, watch Tulo and CarGo walk around the warning track and scream to them. Just don't scream at them about their lack of clutch hitting throughout the year. Go Rockies!

Manager Jim Tracy will lead the walk, although after this year he should be walking straight to his office and figure out a new coaching staff. Hey, that's Eric Young, his dad hit a big home run 18 years ago! Hooray! Thank you, fans! That's what it reads on the scoreboard too; it did say Padres-4 Rockies-0, but we love you fans!

Now we're walking in front of the away team dugout, you know the same away teams that gave us a losing record in what should be one of the toughest home fields in the National League! Yes! Here, take this batting practice ball! Ooooooh, look it's Dinger! He's a dinosaur!

Thank you fans! Nearly three million strong in 2011! Look how much we love you and your ticket buying discretionary income! See our walk of shame!

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Ubaldo A Go-Go

You drew a picture of my morning but you couldn't make my day...

Rockies ace, opening day starter, All-Star starter, 19-game winner, only player to toss no-hitter, Ubaldo Jimenez is traded to the Cleveland Indians. SG is there with some thoughts:

-This might be a classic case of other teams upping the ante at every turn. For the Indians to give not one, but two of their top pitching prospects is a reach on their part. It would be interesting to see what the other teams involved were offering. No word if the Yankees offered a few pages from Derek Jeter's black book.

-Ubaldo will adjust to the American League, right? Look at Matt Holliday in Oakland, he was an average player. He comes back to the NL and is an All-Star. Roy Halliday in Toronto was a very good player, comes to the NL and seemingly is more dominant. Doc Holliday in the OK Corral was very good. Goes to Glenwood Springs and becomes a dentist. OK, I had to throw all the "Hollidays" in there I could.

-We'll have an early indicator of the success of this trade this year. Both Drew Pomeranz and Alex White might be starting for the Rox when the rosters expand. First thing I noticed about the third guy, Joe Gardner was "sinkerball," which goes with Coors Field like cold beer and Dippn Dots.

-Root Sports is quickly turning into Rockies' Pravda. "Hurry, hustle Tracy Ringolsby out there to tell everyone how great the guys we got in here are!" You could almost hear the torment in Drew Goodman's voice as he called the early part of the game. On the other hand, they did allow some scathing texts on the sixth inning to go on air. I liked the one that read, "O'Dowd: does Ubaldo have naked pictures of you and a billly goat?" I made that one up.

-Paging Jorge De La Rosa? How's that injury? Oh yeah, well you're our top guy now. Thanks.

-The secondary controversy seems to be the circus of allowing him to pitch for one inning. But the Rockies didn't want to scratch him due to scaring off other teams in case of injuries. Huh? Make something up: his brother is sick, he has diarrhea, the State Separtment is seeing him because his visa incorrectly read he's from Bonerland. Anything. Or maybe scratch him from his start due to "the fact we are in the process of trading him." Secondarily, Ubaldo said he couldn't focus in the first inning because of the drama. Huh? Is this the steely vet you want who can't block everything out and throw strikes?

-Picture Ubaldo wearing that ridiculous Chief Wahoo hat, wow, that will be weird. He was one of "our guys" and now he's about as far away as possible. That's why I think this trade stings so much for most of Rox Nation. Ubaldo seemed to perfectly fit in the sleeveless black unis the Rox wear. We saw him come up and turn into a dominant guy, and almost to a man, we all knew he'd be that dominant guy again. Regardless of the guys we get back and how they do, Ubaldo will always be that smiling guy that the fanbase had grown to love. I've seen some nice cheers for returning players with other teams, but whenever Ubaldo makes it back to Coors, you might see the biggest yet.

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Monsoon Trade?

You ain't got no wins en mi casa...

The big news on the year's slowest sports day here in the 303 (or is it the 720 now? Hell, I remember when the whole damn state was the 303 and you didn't have to dial an area code. Bahhh, get off my lawn!) is the Rox entertaining trading Ubaldo to the Reds.

Initial reaction is generally "how could they!?" But after the seemingly distant 15-1first half of last year, a few Purp Fans might actually think this could be a move the Rox should at least listen to Cincy.

While the Rox aren't exactly know for schrewd manuevering and covert operations, this could be a classic internal smokescreen. Float the trade to the public so that the happy-go-lucky Ubaldo gets the word that he has the 2nd half to get his ish together or he's moving on out to southern Ohio or points beyond. Of course, that could backfire by pissing off your happy-go-lucky former ace who gets no run support, who has pitched well the last month or so, and who signed a sweetheart hometown deal just last year, just so you can fill the system with position players at power spots where you have substandardly drafted over the last half-decade.

Sounds like a great plan. But hey, the last Denver star who moved on to Ohio worked out to be a good deal, right?

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Atlanta Freaknik

The Rockies completed an epic sweek in the ATL to plunge further down the NL pecking order. Of course, it has lead to the chorus of panic in the streets to fire the manager, trade away the team at the deadline, neuter Dinger, bench everyone from Aaron Cook to Marvin Freeman, and demolish Coors Field and replace it with another Ikea.

Is this season over? Sure feels like it. This team was vastly overrated and is basically half AAA right now with even some AA players creeping into the mix with injuries and ineffectiveness.

What to do what to do what to do? They've tried nearly everything, so perhaps it is time to wave the white flag. There will be great interest in Ty Wigginton, Jason Giambi, and Huston Street. Get some the proverbial prospect or perhaps a ready made player that can help immediately (ie a salary dump player.) There's no reason to think this team will go into Washington against a hot Nationals team and get any sort of momentum. (Optimism creeps in: seven straight games at home following the break. Oh yeah, see results of the last five games.)

Seems awfully damn close to the end of the year. More fine Swedish furniture may be coming to the Denver area.

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Weather Alert

In front of Big Lou's, fighting in the street...

Was there anything more fitting then the end of last night's nailbiter Rox win over the Tribe? A storm moving in, rain coming down, lightning and thunder in the background (thanks to the new non-plural sports team names, we mean actual weather, not Kevin Durant and some hockey guys.)

Basically, it was weather chaos (the announcers were acting like it was some biblical type storm coming in; build an ark!) and who else was on the mound? Noah himself, Huston Street. Never to be one for a ho-hum 1-2-3 inning, Mr T-Storm eventually harnassed the storm adn got some chump on a half check swing. In the future, skip the weather crawl on the bottom of the screen adn replace it with a warning that Street is pitching.

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