Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Handshake Brings All The Boys To The Yard

I make the music, that makes a posse ill
In they Jeeps or playin ball, or ready to chill...

The Rockies' and manager Jim Tracy agreed to a contract extension yesterday that was billed as a "handshake agreement" that will keep Tracy with The Purp "indefinitely."

A multi-billion dollar business and the Rox and their about-average manager (230-210 career with the team) agree to be tied to one another with a "handshake?" That seems just so wrong on every level, but the biggest question is what kind of "handshake" was employed?

I'd like to think it was the old school "double handshake." Think Jimmy Carter/Anwar Sadat/Yitzhak Rabin at Camp David. One extended hand isn't enough, Jim, I'm adding my free hand to convey how much your 230-210 career record means to us.

But maybe Tracy and Dan O'Dowd are a little more street savvy than we think. Maybe they employed the standard hanshake followed by a slick extra move. Did Tracy utter "nuff love" or "aight then" during the handshake? Maybe O'Dowd took it another step further and brought Tracy in for the seminal "Shake and Hug" moment.

Maybe they went off the board completely. Old school Washington Redskins "fun bunch" flying high five between Tracy, O'Dowd, and both Brothers Monfort.

Could anything be more dope than O'Dowd and Tracy going Milli Vanilli chest bump? Is one of them like Howie Mandel and a germophobe and have to go with the fist pound? Big trend in football now seems to be a jumping hip bump; can either of them get that high?

Given the strange circumstances of this "deal" we might never know what was used. Secret handshake.

RELATED: Ill Al Skratch - "I'll Take Her" - ("now you know my style I'm glad you came, I give your man a pound, then I ask you what's your name")



Anonymous skyler ulbrecht said...

How one of those Isiah-Magic kisses?

10:01 AM  
Anonymous Spotwood said...

I'd prefer the godfather style Bavetta-Barkely.

Actually I'd prefer they fire him and bring in a manager that knows how to teach left handers how to hit left handed pitchers.

1:06 PM  
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