Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Chewed At Wrigley

And while you were banging on tables, I was bangin Snow White...

Thoughts to myself as I watched the later portion of the Cubs versus Rockies game last night.

NOTE: I only watched the latter part of the game because I was watching "Dancing With The Stars." Hate away. Part of it is the wife watches the show and the other part is have you seen Erin Andrews half naked without getting a computer virus? Also...Pussy Cat Doll Nicole Schrezererererer. Meow.

NOTE II: Still not sure how a person who dances for a living gets cast in a show which is supposed to take non-dancers. Yet she says she has no advantage because she isn't trained in the dances they perform. That's like Elvis Dumervil not having an advantage in a Football Defense Contest because he's only a linebacker.

NOTE III: Kareem Abdul Jabar and Rick Fox sitting right beside the dance floor and Rick Fox sporting a Sadaam Hussein-like beard. I guess when you've spent the better part of a decade banging Vanessa Williams, then dumped her for Eliza Dushku, you can rock whatever look you want.

NOTE IV: The two above ex-Lakers had their own memorable movie careers. Remember Kareem pre-Airplane kicking the shit out of Bruce Lee in Game of Death? Rick Fox served as Jesus Shuttleworth's guest on his recruiting trip to Big State in He Got Game. The latter I thought was a vastly underrated sports flick.

Again, thoughts to myself as I watched the Cubs/Rox last night:

-Man, I know they just put in lights there, 20 years ago, but the stands sure are dark. Spend a few bones and get some flood lights or something. Those stands are so dark it looks like like someone might get shanked.

-Aramis Ramirez strikes out. F*ck you, Aramis. You were an early round fantasy pick of mine and I had to cut you when you couldn't reach the Mendoza Line with a ten foot poll.

-Carlos Marmol. In know he's pretty decent, but that names always conjures images of a ground hog or some larger rodent.

-Nice beard Ian Stewart. Nice weak dribbler. Less beard, more power dammit.

-I bet Tim Tebow could break this damn tie.

-F*ck you again, Aramis. Your name still sounds like a damn shitty cologne.

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