No Tix For You!

You know my steez
burning to the third degree
sneaky ass alley cat top pedigree…

The local National League baseball club announced yesterday that they would sell tickets to the upcoming World Series via the internet only. No lines, no camping, no wristbands, no lottery, just hundreds of thousands of people trying to log onto a site at one time (that’s about 99,999 more than this wack site.) What could possibly go wrong?

Officials estimate that there will be about 17,000 tickets available for each game, and with a four ticket max, that means about 4500 to 5000 lucky fans will go all Wonka and get their golden tickets.

Most of those people probably work at NASA, have access to the HAL Supercomputer, live in the Tron world, are international hackers, or are stationed on the Death Star. If you don't own a computer, get to your local library or dust off that old Commodore 64.

Even the Commish, nearly everyone he knows, has ever talked to, or even looked at, will be trying as well. A word is coming to mind…and it rhymes with busterluck.

Perhaps this is the easiest way to dole out tickets, which have already been scalped from $375 to upwards of five figures. Call me old school but I miss the days when some local news honk would interview some deadbeat fan camping out in front of the ticket office a week out. Undoubtedly, he’d pine about he did it in 1977 for the AFC Championship and the 1980 Rolling Stones' concert. The media would give the line some cutesy name like RockieTown, YorvitVille, or the Holliday Inn. And there wouldn’t be much alcohol consumed there now would there?

But in 2007, the age of DSL (which might translate to 'dumb shit luck' for those who get tickets,) rowdy crowds, and ticket brokers, the internet-only sale seems like the best format.

Ladies and gentlemen, start your modems.

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