Friday, September 04, 2009

Donks and Drank


When I'm on the mic I make MC's wonder
How I don't make the foul-ups, bleeps or blunders...

Being that it was the fourth and final exhibition game, I watched a grand total of about five minutes of last night's Broncos versus Saints Chargers Cardinals game. However, being that the SG readers demand in-depth analysis, I still am providing the breakdown of what went down in the game:

--The young QB Whathisname looked good. One play he threw a pretty nice pass to that one guy, who broke a couple tackles and also got some good downfield blocking from homeboy. Whathisname was able to get time to throw the ball because them dudes on the o-line stepped up.

--Who grunts better? Biggie on the beginning on "Hypnotize" or Maria Sharapova in any tennis match? Any what was with Maria's 1982 Solid Gold meets Ninja get up?

--The Donk running game was polished, with some swift running from that cat, some nice blocks thrown from that fullback guy, and a power game at the goal line running to the side of whodoyoucallit.

--Two former Slushy Gutter winners hit me up with the Oregon offense going nowhere in their game versus Boise. Why is that significant? Oregon's new OC was held the same position at Colorado last year. His play calling left many Buff fans scratching their heads, as did his delayed handoff in the endzone last night that resulted in a safety.

--Apparently Matt Prater made alot of FGs. Or there were alot of missed two point coversions. Or missed extra points. Or safeties. Either way, the special teams look improved. Or maybe they are really bad. Or they don't have a kicker at all. Or the o-line is pourous when backed up. Or the long snapper sucks.

--I washed some of my daughter's bottles at one point during the night and got to thinking of Houston's DJ Screw and the whole syrup scene. It really isn't too hard to mix up a batch of syrup and get yer freak on for a relatively cheap price. After much debate though, I decided to stick to Coors Light at tailgates and games this year rather than baby bottles of codeine, Sprite, and Jolly Ranchers.

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