5280: The Beers Strike Back

To my motherfuckin' man, fifty grand, the alcoholic man
Inject a tall can to his blood stream if he can...

The past few weeks have seen a steady escalation in beers being thrown down in the Slushy Gutter Summer Mission, and this week the beers fought back. Overall it was a great week, as the pace is finally equal to the 5,280 required by Labor Day. Current Slushy Gutter Winner Rattlesnake Steve felt the barley payback, as he choked down over 50 beers, including a Friday and Saturday stretch of 30. Unfortunately, he "dried out" on Sunday, posting a big goose egg for the day. Trav went to battle on Friday night, gearing up for a big night downtown, only to never make it past his local pub. Some 20 beers later, he too was on the DL all day Saturday and was struck with a big zero for the day. Meanwhile, Broz finally went on the offensive during his housewarming party at his new palatial estate. He checked in at 17 beers for the night and also checked in Sunday on the couch and another nada for the tally. CommishCH fared a bit better than the others, as he finally got on his 2006 pace during a wedding trip to Top Billings. Even the wedding wasn't immune from a smooooooooooooth CL, as he and the bride's uncle swilled canned beer from the front row. Two-time Slushy Gutter Winner T-Dub also went out of town for his drinking adventures on a trip to Glenwood Springs. Slick Rip celebrated his birfday with a few beers, and former Slushy Gutter Winner Pickles posted another consistent weekend. Former Two-time Slushy Gutter Winner JBiz prepped for a trip to crush mass fish in Ontario by crushing 28 beers, and Two-time Slushy Gutter Winner JL Smooth was once again the week's valedictorian with over 60 beers over the week, although he was hindered by the appearance of a "dreadlocked white stoner" who got sick and crashed on his couch. June is winding down, the weather is heating up, and our livers will need to rally. (1491)