Monday, August 23, 2010

Captain Obvious Says Hansen Starts

Drove through the window, the industry super sized me
Now the girls see me and a river's what they cry me...

Dan Hawkins and the rest of his merry men finally confirmed the worst kept secret in Boulder since you told your moms you study at the library every Friday. Tyler Hansen will be the starter when CU opens versus the goats on September 4. Somewhere, little kids are chanting "no duhhhhhhhhh!"

Many Buff fans thought the announcement should've been made in Spring, as August camp opened, or even sooner. Everyone knew Hansen would be the starter over Cody Hawkins; the team, most fans, even that skanky chick that gave you the drip when you were "studying."

Apparently the only person who didn't know was Hawkins the Elder himself. Don't buy into the theories that Old Hawk wanted to a) give a big F U to the program as he went out b) wanted to showcase Cody for the pros or c) lost some sadistic nepotistic bet to his wife.

Whatever Old Hawk's reason was it did foster competition between Hansen and Lil Hawk (my peeps tell me Cody looked sharp in a few instances this camp) and prepared Mini Hawk to replace Hansen in case of injury in the rugged final year of the Big 12. Hansen loads up at the helm with perhaps the best WR depth I've seen at CU maybe ever, at least on paper. The one thing Daddy Hawk HAS to resist is pulling Hansen if he throws one incompletion, takes a sack, or even breaks wind in the huddle.

(NOTE: My buddy Jeremy was on the 8th grade varsity hoops team and shot a wadded piece of paper at a trash can in Algebra class. The 9th grade dipshits saw his attempt and scoffed "I thought you played basketball!" To which he replied smuggly "yeah, not with paper." Thus the rest of the year Jeremy wasn't referred to as 'Jeremy' but 'the guy who doesn't play basketball with paper.')

RELATED: Diamond D - "Best Kept Secret"



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