Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Sports Today is Yawn

You really make me sick with ya fraudulent behavior,
You're gonna make me flip and then an army couldn't save ya...

Today is arguably the lamest day in the sporting year. In an effort to keep the pages full, the SG has sent top notch correspondents to check on these CO Sports story on this down day.

ATLANTA- Brandon Marshall's house. Ring doorbell. Drop hefty sack of Big Mac wrappers labeled "money for B-Marsh". Run. Watch him open door and smile when he sees bag. Chuckle as he opens bag and cries like a little girl.

DENVER- Again, these Colorado Outlaws people are having an all-star game. If they are a motorcycle gang, stay clear of the stadium area. If they are old rum running bootleggers, grab a jug and mosey on down!

ST LOUIS- Check Carl Crawford's glove to see if it is a goalie glove. Missed it by Nelly's diamond earring length, Brad. Damn near sea-level ball park.

SWEDEN- Avs traverse halfway around the world to get a new goaltender. The big question is he the fifth member of ABBA?

LAS VEGAS- Ty Lawson has an off night debut for the Nugs. Hmmmm, young ballers, new money, Vegas? Seems like a perfect place to expect a player's best basketball.

FRANCE- Garmin Slipstream is a Boulder based cycling team and performing quite well in the Tour...and big up to my french vanillas, parlez vous, Francais, mi amor, merci, oui oui, bon bons and all that good stuff.

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