Lamb Chopped

I'm not sayin I'm number one, umm, I'm sorry, I lied
I'm number one, two, three, four and five...

The first complete football weekend here at Slushy Gutter weekend was about as successful as a wayward penis at a lesbian gathering. Our beloved Buffs went down in a tough game at Invesco, 14-10 to the hated sheep from the north. As the game ticked away, murmurs of "Go Broncos" echoed through the Buff faithful, hoping for some joy in their weekend. Word must've not have reached Jake Plummer as he had more turnovers than Marie Callenders as the Donks also posted a mere 10 in their 18-10 loss to the St Louis Rams.

It can't be all that bad though, can it? Uhh, yes it can. The Buffs first opponent, Montana State lost to a Division II team, Chadron State. With two top 25 opponents as their next two games: at Folsom on national TV this Saturday versus Arizona State, then at Georgia, then game #5 at Mizzou, the Buffs are looking at a possible 0-5 start.

Where are the problems for the Buffs? First and foremost is the QB play, or lack of QB play. Bernard Jackson started versus the lambs, produced an electric opening TD drive, but then proceeded to be bottled by the defense. The sheep dared him to throw, putting more in the box than a Paris Hilton sex tape. The Buff WRs were single covered throughout the anemic 2nd half and Jackson and the Buffs' coaching brain trust did not throw their direction once.

The defense played well, but a few bad penalties, poor clock management, and a questionable ref calls made this a tough loss for the Black and Gold. Sunshine Dan and his cronies had best get their play calling and recruiting together.

On the pro side, Jake Plummer nearly handed the entire game to the Rams. A couple of his INTs were thrown into complete coverage, and his fumble lead to a quick 3 points. If not for a tough Bronco defense (sound familiar?) this game could've been the 36-10 variety. Mike Bell and Tatum Bell ran well, outside of the elder Bell's fumble early on. Javon Walker looked cold in his Bronco debut, dropping a sure TD and then dropping a first down toss.

Slushy Gutter-wise, many, many beers were consumed. In what is shaping up to be a long year in Boulder, and with plenty of opening day questions down in Dove Valley, Slushy Gutter Fall could be a prevailing theme through December.